Conversation to the Younger ME

Another restless night. Earlier in the evening, I had fallen asleep watching some melodrama “reality” show of people indulging entirely too much: in profanity, alcohol, and absurdity. Understanding how addictions and life can take control of us. I digress. As I laid in bed, I turned over and noted that it was 3 am and sighed heavily, because I had to get up in 3 hours to battle the unforeseen events of the day.  However, I have found that most of my deepest insight and life revelations have come from these early morning sessions. A discussion with a colleague was still at the forefront of my mind and kept replaying like a broken record. Our conversation entailed things you wish you would’ve known about getting older?  What would you have told your younger self to make life a bit easier?  My mind took me on a journey through past and current experiences that I have been through.  I decided upon these takeaways to gift myself.gift

Self…It’s okay not knowing. I have always been a very precocious individual and observant of the things around me. I was so afraid to make mistakes that I wanted to be calculated in every aspect of my life. My life was set up like a detailed road map with each age having a milestone to reach. There was a limitless high when each goal was met as well as a relentless sense of failure when things didn’t go according to plan.  Tangible rewards (degrees, money, cars, prestige, etc.) became the foundation life was built on because it proved that catching up with the Jones’ could be a reality. Therefore, I conditioned myself on what success was and the steps taken to achieve this sought-after
goal.                                                                                                                        Success

When we deviate from this path of “success” or take a substantial amount of time to figure our life purpose, The Microwave Society, is unpleased with us and reminds us we are not meeting expectations. Artist Daley eloquently articulates the futile nature of planning and the warped speeds that govern our lives. “Slow, slow down…..nothing will happen before its time…because good things come to those who wait.”

The extreme highs and lows I felt as a result of my planning, manifested fear, doubt, anxiety, and instability in my life. Through life experiences I have gained insight on how to deal with these issues…understanding my journey, understanding myself and understanding self-love.

inner peace 2Self…Get to know you. There is no greater peace like knowing yourself. When you begin to dissect and get to the core of you, there is an indescribable joy. No longer are you holding on to the guilt’s of the past, living an existence filled with self-loathing and being controlled by minute people. Self…breakdowns will happen with a growing understanding from experience as you transition. Don’t be resistant (Thanks- you know who you are :)). Take these new pieces of data and create a NEW plan that YOU can control. Let go of embedded beliefs and discover your own truths. It is okay to challenge the powers that be even if they are your parents. You must decide what you believe.

I came across an excerpt of a video with Dr. Maya Angelou on an episode of Oprah’s Super soul Sunday about her revelation of life. This title alone grabbed my attention because I felt what incident could have been so significant to lay an imprint on this prophetic woman’s life? She said, it was knowing that a force that made everything–loved her. “God loves me and I am amazed at it. And grateful for it.”

 

Last but not least. Self…LOVE YOU.

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. gsusocialmedia
    Sep 22, 2013 @ 19:22:08

    WOW – there is a lot of stuff here. This is a really good post – revealing and real and I thank you for sharing all of that. I loved the beginning the best – the part about it being ok not to know everything. You lost me just a bit on the microwave society. I think planning has a place in our life or we are always a victim. The trick is learning what you can’t control. I still work on that part. In my opinion there is no human being that has the ability to speak power with words like Maya Angelou. Thanks for this post.

    Reply

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